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Today is my dear friend Texas Linda’s kjhkuueth Birthday.

That did come out readable, right?

So let’s see if I understand this.

Her boarder has decided today to move out … but hasn’t told her officially … wouldn’t want to give her any advanced warning or anything.

Her daughter is due in town any minute to make final arrangements for the burial of her granddaughter. And the entire family is in relative chaos.

Her newly operated-on shoulder (the after effects of a car accident) made a strange popping sound this morning and now hurts as badly as it did before the reparative surgery.

She was taken to dinner by the man she has dated for ten years, who nobody seems to know is seeing her … hoping for an engagement ring or some sign of commitment after ten years. Instead he gave her two insulting cards signed “Bob”.

Not “Love, Bob.” Not “To the Love in My Life, Bob.” Not “Wishing you a Happy Birthday, Honey. Love Bob” … Just “Bob”.

And he did not give her a gift … just a boatload of complaints about how she wasn’t doing what he thought she should be doing.

The freezer stopped working and she came home to melted ice cream, soft vegetables and no ice.

Then her foot just started to swell … and turn purple … for no apparent reason.

Being the sane, sensible woman that she is … she changed her Facebook Status to “Single”, called yours truly, and proceeded to go to the local Ice Cream shop for the biggest most calorie-laden concoction that they had. That will help the old diet.

She did, however, get a lovely card from a local politician running for re-election and a birthday gift of thirty free minutes for her cell phone … after she purchases another 120 minutes first.

Happy Birthday, Texas Linda.