Lung, stomach, heart, liver and suet aside … I never knew Haggis was basically meatloaf.
It appears I wasn’t the only one.
“Well, my husband REFUSES to try Hummus.” she ranted. “The mere thought of it offends him. Just imagine. And who could blame him after all?”
I found myself wondering what in the world chickpeas had ever done to him to cause such a reaction.So just to be sure I asked.
“Hummus? He refuses to eat Hummus?”
“Yes. Of all the disgusting things to consider eating. And she wanted us to have some. I cannot blame him. Not even a little bit. Although I am far more adventurous in all things culinary. But not this. So-or-ry.”
That moment where you are pretty sure she means Haggis, not Hummus … and you aren’t sure it is even worth the effort to clarify. Yeah. That.
But she is a friend. So I dove in.
“Chickpeas? Is he allergic to chickpeas? I know someone else who is allergic to …”
“Not chickpeas.” she said emphatically. “Hummus. That godawful stuff the Scottish people eat. Made from Sheep Stomach.”
I forged ahead.
“Oh that. That’s Haggis. HummUs is nothing but blended chickpeas. You know … garbanzo beans? Blended with a little oil maybe … and maybe a little flavor added. Like from roasted red pepper. Or garlic. Or Sesame Paste. Or even Feta Cheese.”
Long pause on the other end as she was deciding which was worse … Hummus or Haggis.
“It’s dip. Like dip you can use with vegetables. Or crackers.” I said.
Dip she understands.
“Well, I guess that doesn’t sound too bad.” she said.
Yes. I know that is a stretch. A long stretch at that.
But I saw this picture … along with a recipe. And for all the world, it reminded me of meatloaf.
It even has gravy.
Okay, so if you look past the fact that the first five ingredients are Sheep’s Lung, Sheep’s Stomach, Sheep’s Heart, Sheep’s Liver and Suet … it is almost meatloaf.
If it was Ground Meat, Oatmeal, Onions, Salt, Pepper, Nutmeg and Beef Stock it wouldn’t be so bad, would it? With gravy?
“Well, I guess that’s better than the horse meat they had in the hamburgers at Burger King over there.” she said.
What? Did she think we were selling them all those horses for glue?
“Well,” she concluded “at least it’s not like when the President was little and he ate dogs.”
I decided to just let that one slide.
You’ve got to choose your battles.