I woke to see this in my notes. She is now “Following” me here on FB. Obviously because I endorse a healthy lifestyle and lots of physical exercise.
The comments started. “Well, uh . . . she certainly does look very healthy” and “I can’t believe her mother let her out of the house dressed like that !”
And on close examination of Boom Boom Cutesy Pie, a Facebook friend said “Gotta love that photoshopped bikini. Subtle.”
Photoshopped bikini? Really? I hadn’t noticed. Guess I didn’t look that closely.
The comments continued.
“That is one of the problems of having people follow you rather than having them as friends. This is probably a fake picture and you are really being followed by a CIA operative. Or the GOP.”
If it is the GOP or the CIA or any other letter combos, they are going to be sorely disappointed when they find out the real me.
The real me has been looking forward to meeting yet another Online Dating person. This one has been patiently waiting … and we’ve been trying … since the Spring. And tomorrow is the day.
So of course I got my hair done.
Oh. Did I mention it has been raining off and on for a few days? Have you seen what rain does to my hair? But I digress.
So. My day started with an … interesting follower … and ended with an … interesting exit … from my customer late this afternoon. At the bottom of the driveway, a huge rain puddle zapped my car battery for a few … then two miles up the road I realized I had a flat tire. On my way to do my radio shift.
The good news? I called to let them know, and one of the guys from the station came out and changed my tire so I wasn’t late for my shift. Or as the station manager said when I got there “Hey, if you can’t ask us to help you, who can you ask?”
Oh, but wait … there’s more.
Did I mention that my trunk … where the spare was … was also full of things from my Mom’s recent kitchen downsizing? And said things are now filling the back seat and floor of my car?
Did I mention that it has been raining? And standing in the rain … the tire … the greasy dirty tire … my clothes … I think you get the picture. It’s not pretty. This ought to impress the daylights out of him tomorrow.
And in the final chapter of A Perfectly Awful Horrible Day … yes … there IS more … and I’m going to skip the whole gasoline / price / carwash misunderstanding.
On the way home I decided to get a root beer float at The Meadows. The Ice Cream place, not the Mental Facility.
Flavor of the day? No good. No problem. I wanted a root beer float anyway. I saw a sign for some new something or another so I asked.
“Great day for ice cream,” he said “the new mini-splits are like half banana splits … 50 cents off. All the sundaes are half off. Ice cream is …” and on and on.
Me: Any good deals on Black Cows? (root beer float)
He: Um, No
Me: Hey, it figures …. it’s been one of those days …
And I proceed to tell him about some of the crummy events o’ the day. He shares a funny story about some strange folks who came to the place and goes off to make the Black Cow.
A minute later he comes back, opens the window, and puts his head down on the counter … his forehead resting on his arms.
“I can’t believe this … and I feel really bad telling you this … but our carbonation machine just went out. It’s broke. The root beer is flat.”
Of course it is.
I am now sitting here slurping on a root beer sundae. With flat root beer. I don’t care. It tastes great.
You’ve gotta see the silver lining. Tomorrow I’ll have a new tire.
Mmm. Black cow. Excellent choice.
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