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Fire ants

Fire ants (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Living in the country, more or less, we have the occasional animal. That is to be expected.

Deer, Raccoons, Squirrels and a healthy amount of Field Mice are everywhere. And that is fine as long as they all carve their Part of Paradise from the outside of my house.

And then there are the little creatures. Bugs. Crawly Things. Inside The House Things.

They seem to go in cycles. 2010 was big for Stink Bugs. 2011 was for Spiders … who ate the Stink Bugs so I didn’t try too hard to get rid of them. 2012 was a good year for Wasps, Hornets and Bumble Bees.

And this year is the Year of the Ants.

Every four years or so we get an Ant Year. They seem to show up in those years where it is super hot outside and pretty cool inside.

And. They. Are. Everywhere.

Crawling up the walls in the Kitchen in a line. Coming out of nowhere on the floor if a piece of anything edible is dropped and missed (think garbage can)

Crawling on the floor upstairs.

The other day, one crawled onto the chair in the room here and onto a friend of mine … who promptly screamed bloody murder and moved faster than light out of the chair, arms flapping, legs pumping.

A week ago, when my neighbor who is helping with the landscaping outside came over, he informed me that they too had ant problems. Inside and in the Garden.

He said he hated to use chemicals, so Boiling Water was the solution of choice. I felt a wave of pity for the little guys … being boiled alive outside.

But yesterday when I caught a few Ants crawling onto my bed sheets … well, that was the limit. Pity flew out the window.

Everybody has a limit on creepy-crawly-tolerance, and I had hit mine.

Miners (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Now I have all the admiration in the world for these little guys. They are often seen carrying their dead back to wherever they live. They carry food that is relatively heavy for their body weight back to feed all the other ants. They make great first pets for little children who enjoy Ant Farms.

But not in my house.

So I trotted off to get some kind of Ant Removal System. The one I usually use is a small round red tin type of thing … filled with poison and a “Welcome All Ants” sign … written in Ant-ese I think. This makes the Years of the Ants the easiest to handle.

This year the Ant Traps are called Ant Killing Systems.

A bit violent sounding, don’t you think?

Says it kills Sweet & Grease Eating Ants. Fine, I thought … grateful that they weren’t traps for Sweet & Grease Eating People.

antKills Pavement Ants. Not sure, but would these be Homeless Ants? Mine have a home. Mine.

Kills Odorous Ants. I didn’t get close enough to smell them, but it was nice to know they’d be covered.

Kills Little Black Ants. Yep, that’s what I have. That and Slightly Bigger Black Ants. Are they covered?

Says they kill ants … but does not kill Harvester Ants, Fire Ants and Carpenter Ants. Also not Pharaoh Ants.

I didn’t ask any of them what their occupation or royal lineage might be.

I did, however notice that there was the odor of peanut butter when I poked the holes through the tins.

Now I understand. Peanut Butter would work on me too.

But isn’t that included in the Sweet and Grease category?